Hey everyone. I hope you are all well. Based on the last post – College or Work? Decision Time, where I spoke about making a decision on whether to continue with education with no stable support or to quit school and get a job. If you haven’t read that post yet, please do, so you can understand more about what this post is about.
I have spoken to my parents about the whole dilemma that I am facing. They adviced that I should continue with education. I agree it’s a good idea. But there are other things to think about. I need support. I need finance and childcare support. You’re asking me to go on to a higher level, I need to eat, and a warm house. And these things cost money. I could get a loan but a debt of £’000 is not something I want to get myself into. I just wouldn’t cope with it all – the workload and things being a whole mess at home at the same time, especially with lack of support.
So I sat down and had a really good thought about everything. I honestly feel devasted but I chose to not continue with Education, at least not now. The reason for that is because I have no strong support system. By that, I mean childcare support, finance, as well as good health. It is very heartbreaking but I believe I have done all my best in my Education. I have had a rollercoaster journey pursuing Education, and Boy! it was a ride. I started going to college way back in 2006. I know, you must be thinking, Sonia, what in the hell happened? Girl, Where do I start?
So what now? Well, I am still in the process of coming up a plan. I need to get a part-time job. Blogging is great but I because I am still fairly new to blogging, it could take a long time for me to actually start making money from the industry. I also have an idea of getting into an apprenticeship, that way I am not only working and learning but it can be done around Sasha-Ann.
While I try to come up with a plan, I will be spending alot of ‘me’ time. Especially when my daughter starts going to school. I will have alot of time during the day on my hands to burn. Whatever I get up to, I will definitely post a life update on the blog. I am talking about reinventing myself. Eating healthy, going to the gym, brunch with some friends, saving money, getting my social life back. I have been very focused on my education because I wanted a good life/future for my daughter and me. Now I just want to get my life back and we take things there pretty much.
How Do I feel?
I feel sad about how things are going for me. But I believe God has a plan for everyone. We all have to learn to accept things happens for a reason. I know for sure that I made the right decision to come to college. I have seen so much growth in my daughter and myself. One thing I have now learned from all this, ‘If it’s not for you, It’s not for you’ Accept it and move on.’ When you really want something, you would want to get it, by all means, and there is nothing wrong with that.
However, we also have to let go at some point. So take a sit back and breathe and try to figure out why things are not working for you and see if you can change it. If you can, great. If you can’t, then just move on. Regardless of everything that has happened, I know I have done myself and my daughter proud. In the future, I can look back and say I did my best.