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Thank you, Next – 5 Things My Exes Taught Me

Thank you, Next – 5 Things My Exes Taught Me. Hey guys, in today’s post I am going to talk about – 5 things my exes taught me. I have recently ended a 7 Months relationship of which I thought would lead to something serious, and from my previous post, How To Deal With A Break-Up, you would know me that I love to write my feelings.

Thank You, Next – 5 Things My Exes Taught Me

It’s Not Your Fault

When a relationship ends, there is simply nothing you can do about it. The most common thing we all do when a relationship end is we blame ourselves, which then make us feel guilty and want to try to make it work by asking for a second chance. Sometimes people change when they finally know what they want, sometimes people are not ready for what you want and sometimes people don’t know what they want and take advantage of the fact you know what you want. It’s not your fault. There’s nothing wrong with you. You just picked the wrong partner.

Nothing Is Yours Unless It Has Your Name On It

This will forever stay with me as it relates to anything in life and doesn’t have to relate to relationships. However we are talking about relationships here so, I am going to explain. In other words, if he has not put a ring on it, paid your bride price or made some kind of commitment with you, he doesn’t belong to you. There’s no point in dating a man/woman for 1 whole year without doing anything to show some sort of commitment to the significant other.

Time is too Precious to waste it on someone who does not want to commit.

Communication Is Key

Without Communication you have nothing. There is no trust, there’s no loyalty, there’s no love – you have nothing. It is very advisable to date someone who has the same interests as you. If you like travelling – get someone who’s into travelling, if you like music – get someone who’s into dating, if you like fashion – get someone who’s into fashion, if you like politics – get someone who is into politics too.

Love Is Real

I don’t care what anyone has told you about ‘Love’ – it’s real and it is powerful. It’s your choice to give and take it or not. Sometimes, love is so powerful that if you decide you want to just take it and not give some back, you will end giving more love than what you are getting and not realising it.

If You Have To Wonder If The Man/Woman You Are In A Relationship With Is Into you, They’re Not.

You can Have It All

Before my recent failed relationship, I finally felt that I had it all. A daughter, a man, a home and a great new job. Like this was all I ever wanted. Being in this relationship, I realise that it doesn’t matter how you look, what you have or don’t have, it doesn’t matter what situation you are in. You can have it all. There is a man for every woman.

Thank You, Next – 5 Things My Exes Taught Me

Last but not least – Put in the work

In this recent relationship, I did some things that I never thought I could do for a man again, but somehow I found myself doing it. Trust me when you have a child, it is very hard to find time to put in work in a relationship. Whether it is cooking a romantic dinner, finding time to go on date nights, struggling to find a babysitter and affording it. Saving money and time you should be spending on yourself, but instead, you want a relationship to work, you have to find a balance. Boy, it was difficult. And was it all worth it?? To be honest, I don’t know.

23 Comments

  • Clarice

    I totally agree with you with all the things you mentioned. Despite all the pain, I can still say that yes, love is real and powerful. Communication is also very important.

    Anyway, I shared your post and hopefully, it reaches someone who may need all of these reminders.

  • Luna S

    Communication is a huge one! You can’t have a true relationship without communication on some kind of level. Without it you’ll end up fighting frequently, I know when my husband and I first started dating it was something we had to learn to work on more.

  • Erica (The Prepping Wife)

    First off, I love the title of this post! It made me giggle and intrigued me. Everything you wrote here is spot on, especially how much work relationships take and how important it is to put in the time and effort. I never have regretted any experience in my life, because that is how we gain wisdom. Those can teach us about ourselves, and what we want or don’t want in a relationship. I will always be grateful for that.

  • Daphne Takahashi shi

    This lessons are sooo true! Lots of women need to see this…we need to empower our selfs and really understand your number 1 lesson: it’s not our fault

  • Kristin

    I really couldn’t have said this better. Each thing you listed are all a big part of growing after a relationship. Its so crazy how much we can learn and grow from something that was either a really long time in life or something that was brief lived!! Thanks so much for sharing!

    • Carol

      I dated a man that told me “I’m not boyfriend” material. I should have listened!! Like you said, sometimes you pick the wrong partner. I don’t regret the relationship and learned to listen for subtle clues.

  • Kelly Martin

    These are really important lessons. I think it’s so important to learn from our previous relationships so we don’t make the same mistakes again.

    • Subhashish Roy

      Every relationship whether it works or not teaches us a great deal and helps us to mature. When you look back you realize probably that the decisions made were not well thought of and many a times more emotional than practical. Learn and move on is in my opinion the best way to look forward.

  • Clarice

    Totally agree with you. Communication is definitely the key. I realized this when my ex and I broke up. Now that I am married — this is one of our top priorities. 🙂

  • Adriane

    Thank you for sharing! I’m an anomaly and have only have had one boyfriend who became my husband in my life but I’m sure this message can and will help so many women. I love your last point about putting the work in. Relationships (ALL) take so much work!

  • Kristen

    Some of these lessons are harder to learn and accept than others but they are universal. No relationship is easy and sometimes you have to decide if it is worth the work or if it’s time to move on.

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