Why Sacrificing In Life Isn’t Always Bad For You (1)
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Why Sacrificing In Life Isn’t Always Bad For You

Why Sacrificing In Life Isn’t Always Bad For You. Hello everyone, I hope you are well. In today’s post, I have a guest post from Anne Jones. Anne Jones is a spiritual healer and co-creator of ‘Artaban The Musical’. Anne will share why sacrificing can benefit you and why compromise and balance are needed. The feeling of sacrificing our dreams to help others can often leave us feeling frustrated and unfulfilled. However, it’s important to remember that helping others is a noble and selfless act that can bring great joy and meaning to our lives. By putting the needs of others before our own, we can positively impact the world and create a sense of purpose far more significant than any individual dream. Finding a balance between helping others and pursuing our goals is essential. Still, when we do make sacrifices for the benefit of others, we should try to view it as a positive and rewarding experience.

Why Sacrificing In Life Isn’t Always Bad For You

On a mountain in Tibet, I learnt how important it is to value what I have. Otherwise, it will disappear. In a church in Pondicherry, India, I realised that I had spent my life trying to please others. Insights can occur where you least expect them, with my latest understanding arriving through the story of Artaban, told by the poet and philosopher Henry van Dyke, in his book The Fourth Wise Man.

My friend Daphne and I had decided to turn his book into a musical, and I wrote the words of the songs, immersing myself in the tale. My insight came from the story’s truth that many of us sacrifice our dreams for the sake of those we love and, often, for total strangers!

Happy Ending

In Henry’s story, Artaban was the fourth magi who wished to give gifts and support to Jesus, the prophesied new king. Unfortunately, Artaban missed his rendezvous with the other three wise men because he was delayed in helping a man in trouble on the side of the road. By the time he reached Bethlehem, the family had moved on to Egypt. The following 30 years of his life were dedicated to searching for the man he believed would save the world from the pervading evil and corruption. However, he was constantly delayed and sidetracked from his quest by his compassionate heart and desire to help anyone he met who was suffering or in need. He put the needs of others first and sacrificed his dream. He even gave up the great love of his life in his desire to travel free and unencumbered by family and domestic ties.

Although he got great pleasure from helping others, he struggled with his disappointment and the depression that came with self-doubt and the feeling that he had failed – failed to fulfil his promise to himself to help Jesus improve the world. He eventually did catch up with Jesus at the time of his crucifixion. This was when he had his ‘AHA’ moment! He realised that maybe he had fulfilled his role of helping to bring light to the world by his kindness to others. At the show’s end, we leave him with understanding and joy as he realises that he has fulfilled his life quest and purpose. A happy ending indeed.

Depression and Mental Illness

A few weeks ago, I watched everyday folk suffering intense pain as they pushed themselves through their limits to run a marathon to raise money, most often for strangers. As I write, an ex-marine puts himself through agonies as he runs, swims, and cycles; he has one arm and no legs. It’s an incredible feat to help people he doesn’t know.

I can see that sacrifice and suffering for others is an essential part of the very spirit of being human. But my insight takes me further. I think of the many who are caring for parents with dementia, of mothers who put their careers on hold to bring up their children, of men who turn to their domestic responsibilities and leave their dreams and adventures on the shelf. They become sad and downhearted. I can see that too much sacrifice can dim our light. It can bring on resentment. Like Artaban, it makes us feel like we are failures when we judge ourselves against the achievements of others. It can cause depression and mental illness.

So, check …

  • Are you sacrificing your life dreams because of responsibilities to other people?
  • Do you consistently put other people’s needs before your own?

Like Buddha, I am a great believer in the Middle Road. Of Compromise. Of Balance. When you do too much, give too much of yourself away, and put others before yourself all the time, you are in danger of suffering mental health issues: depression, disappointment, lack of self-esteem, unfulfillment and a sense of being limited.

I cared for my mother through the last years of her life, and I learnt then that I needed to keep myself happy, stimulated, and healthy (mind and body) to be the best for her and myself.

Overwhelmed And Sacrificing Too Much

Here are a few pointers to help you if you find yourself overwhelmed by your responsibilities and sacrificing too much of yourself for the sake of others.

Always Find Time For Your Very Favourite Pastime

Whether you enjoy cinema, travelling, reading, gaming, sports, etc. – whatever turns on your mojo, make sure you find time for it.

Allow Your Emotions To Flow

When you care for someone or spend most of your time looking after the needs of others (and I include children here, too), there will be times when your frustrations can turn to anger or resentment – so make sure you vent these feelings. Do it away from others, scream into a stone and hurl it or write down your feelings and burn the paper. Get it out!!!

Say No!

You step into sacrifice when you insist on saying yes when screaming ”o more inside. If you persist in taking on more and more, you will become sick!

Get Help

Don’t feel you have to carry the whole burden on your shoulders. Spreading the load may help others grow, especially in the home. Children brought up to help instead of freeloaders become better partners, friends, and citizens. They will also have greater self-esteem by being included in the domestic family workload. Mother does not need to do it all! Being a martyr is not trending. Allow others to share.

Find Time For Your Dream

Even if you get up early in the morning or work late into the night, try to fulfil your dream. Maybe plan it now for action later, but give it some attention and keep the flame alive within you.

Balance Your Lifestyle

Finally, balance your lifestyle by giving and receiving, working and playing, helping others, and helping yourself. Love is the key to happiness, and balance is the key to contentment.

I hope you enjoyed that.

Talk soon.

 

Anne JonesABOUT THE AUTHOR

Anne Jones is a spiritual healer, author of seven books translated into 18 languages, and co-creator of ”urban The MMusical’which is based on the book ”the Fourth Wise Man”by Henry van Dyke.

For more information about ‘Artaban, The Musical’ (and to listen to some original music), see https://artabanthemusical.co.uk/.

To book tickets: https://actorschurch.ticketsolve.com/shows/873618294.

 

 

Working with Strong women, I help empower women not to give up on their goals and find true happiness within themselves. #lifestyle #womenempowerment #selfcare

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